Great Things Going on at Aveda

Today, I had the opportunity to be a part of a semi-annual State of the Tribe webinar for Aveda. I already knew that I was partnering with one of the greatest companies in the world, but I honestly think Aveda IS THE GREATEST. Why? So many reasons, but today I learned that this year $5.5 million was raised for Earth Month! Isn't that just unbelievable?! Since 1999 when Aveda started raising money for Earth Month, $31 million has been raised-$25million for clean water. Just hearing these statistics literally blew my mind, gave me the chills and made me want to do more.

It was also fun to hear that Aveda has seventeen nominees for NAHA this year. If you aren't familiar with NAHA, which stands for North American Hairstyling Awards, they are pretty much the Oscars for hairdressers. The student category for NAHA has only FIVE nominees and three of those are Aveda students! That's HUGE!

I learned that we have some really great new products coming up, which I am excited to use myself!  I love that Aveda is very selective when choosing who they partner with, and one of my favorite parts of the webinar was hearing President Dominique Conseil say "You guys are the sunshine of the haircare market."

Salon M's Aveda education calendar for the month of July is busy and we are GRATEFUL! We can't wait to share all of the new and exciting things that we have learned!

I always love reading the Aveda Mission:

Friendship

What is a best friend? What does it take to be a good friend? As I get a little older, I am realizing that true friends are harder and harder to come by. When I say TRUE FRIENDS or BEST FRIENDS I mean the exact same thing. I mean someone that will give me the cold, hard truth about anything and everything knowing that I just might not love hearing it. That means that I can do the same for them not having to be afraid that our friendship will be over. I have a friend that I call my soul mate friend, and we always joke that we are such good friends that if we ever killed anyone we would tell each other. Don't be alarmed...it wouldn't happen, but that's how much we trust each other. That is the kind of friendship I'm talking about.  It means that we could go five, ten or even twenty years without seeing each other but pick right back up where we left off without any awkwardness.

I have been extremely blessed throughout my life with several really great friends. I actually haven't had too many terrible experiences. I just know when it's time to let go of friends. It hasn't always been easy because there was something, at some time that attracted me to the friendship but I have had to in order to feel good about my life and to just be real.

My two best friends are of the same name, different spelling. They are girls that I can be my complete self around, no bs'ing (maybe a little of that). That feels so good, so free'ing. I know that I comfort them when they are going through something and I know that I can go to them when I have something to celebrate or something that I need support with. I have had these two best friends since I can remember--one since elementary and one since middle school. I love to know many people but be super close with just a few.

I love following Jada Pinkett Smith on Facebook because I think she is extra wise. She posted this a week or so ago:

"Letting Go.

I have a friend that I had to lovingly let go. We had very different perspectives on what being a friend meant. There was no right or wrong...just different. Unfortunately, we lacked the ability to find a happy medium that made our friendship enjoyable, and we went our separate ways. Today, I realized that the ability for two people to separate, for the reason that you care for the other so much and desire them to be happy and accepted for who they are without question or doubt, IS a gift of friendship. We were able to take care of ourselves as well as one another. This experience gave me a different definition of "friendship", and that at times "friendship" can come in forms we don't recognize.

I am grateful for the lesson.
J"

You want me to sign a WHAT to work for YOU?

I have been so busy doing so many "things" to get ready for Salon M Spa to open its doors. There are things that I didn't even consider having to do when I decided to become a salon owner. I KNEW what I was getting myself into, no doubt, but I didn't think about writing policies and procedures as much as I thought about just having a GREAT place for people to come and for people to work.

When it comes to non compete contracts, we all know that I have a bad taste in my mouth about them. I didn't as much one year ago, but I do now and I probably always will going forward. I feel that if someone doesn't want to work for me, I should wish them the best and hope that in some way, shape or form I helped mold their career. I would never feel right standing in the way of someone being able to follow their dreams. I feel that as long as I am creating a great work environment, valuing my employees as they should be valued then people will want to continue working for me. As an owner of a business, we do not own the guests or even employees that come to our business. The only way to do that would be to make the guest sign a contract as well as the stylist, massage therapist/technician, etc. Who would do that? Can you imagine signing a contract at the grocery store that it would be the only store that you would ever shop at? No. Again, if you are good at what you do and you treat people properly then you should not have to be worried or threatened. Competition is very healthy, in my opinion.

Yesterday (May 25th), I read a thread about non-competes on the facebook page of BehindTheChair.com. It was really interesting to read what people from all over the place thought about these types of contracts. Most people have never and would never sign them or work for someone who has them and a few people believe that they are actually a good idea.

Here are some of the posts from Facebook:

• I as a salon owner won't use one. I was an employee who had one years ago and left was taken to court and won. The judge said the contract was not a non complete it was an enslavement contract and that it was not enforceable. If someone isn't happy let them go. I am confident in my skills and in my business. I encourage my staff to build their clientele and teach them how to cultivate and retain them. That's part of being a good owner. Why then should I worry if they move on. I could be the hinderer of their dreams or a stepping stone who helped build their dream. Mentors are important in this business too.
  
• It's unacceptable for this industry to be called a profession when that's going on. If your really that worried about competition make sure you take care of the stylists you have and make sure they are the best so they don't leave.
  
• As a salon owner, these are ridiculous! If a stylist is unhappy I don't want them working for me and spreading negativity!
  
• If a salon owner isn't confident enough to keep you happy as a stylist working at their salon nor confident that it's their salon that keeps the client not the stylist perhaps you should just save yourself the time, don't sign and just go work for someone else.
  
• It's CRAP and not enforceable. YOU are the reason they keep coming back. I went through that crap and it almost ruined my career. I found out a couple years later that it doesn't even stand up in court in Florida, it's a scare tactic. If you sign it, you're seriously an idiot. That's the first red flag of being OWNED and stuck in a micromanaging environment. Be good to your employees and they won't want to take off with their clients.  
  
• I think it's selfish and a force of contract! Taking advantage of someone new in the hair business is how I see it! If you have to force a stylist to sign this, how secure are you as an owner???

Check out the rest here:
 https://www.facebook.com/behindthechair 
 

She Let Herself Go

Today, I was able to really FEEL that I chose the right career.

I have known for a long time that I have wanted to be a hairdresser. I have told the story many times that in elementary school (2nd grade...I think?) our teachers asked us to make tshirts for MLK Day about what we wanted to be. I wanted to be a cosmetologist, but I didn't know how to spell that long word. I really wish I would have kept that shirt with the stick person sitting in the hydraulic salon chair getting their haircut by another stick person. ;)

As a kid, I remember my friends coming over and I always wanted to do their hair. I didn't ever want to go outside to play, really. I remember being 7 or 8 and having my curling iron all fired up and then my little cousin grabbing it with her hands and getting a sweet blister. I got in a little trouble over that ordeal. My friend's parents would say "Maybe a little less hairspray this time, Amanda." ;)

Today, I had a client who I haven't seen in awhile. I know that she has been through a lot over the last several months. Actually, more than a lot. More than anyone should go through in a lifetime. I could tell that she really needed me. She was nervous because I had never done her hair before, but she hadn't had her hair cut or colored in months so she knew she needed a change. She had about four inches of very grey outgrowth when she arrived. We talked about what we would do and how it was time for something new and fresh. She told me that she looked online before she came at "old lady" hairstyles and it made her sick at what the styles were for her age. I remember going into her business while I was in beauty school and she always had her nails polished. When she arrived, she did not have her nails done. I could just tell that she had stopped taking care of herself over the last few months. I colored her hair and then cut it. I then cut her bangs like we talked about. She said "My bangs are too short." (Hairdresser heart attack....) I asked her to just wait until we were all done and then we would take a look at everything. I finished up styling and teaching her how to style her new cut, asked her to put on her glasses and then handed her the mirror. She looked at it and said "Oh my...I LOVE IT!!!" She smiled SO big and then she began to cry. She finally felt good...and she looked so beautiful.

My passion is not about playing with hair all day. That is not what drives me. My passion is about taking people away from the things that they worry about all day just for an hour or maybe it's only a half hour. I love to learn about people and the way that they tick. I love to know EVERYTHING about people.  I love making people feel special because everyone is.

Two Happy Homes vs One Unhappy Home

Most people know that I have been divorced and remarried. I am not ashamed of it, I am not embarrassed of it and I proud that I was brave enough to get myself and my kids into a happy home. When people say that they are "staying together for their child(ren)", I always call bullshit on that. Kids KNOW when their parents aren't truly in love, they know when there is tension-even if parents say they aren't fighting in front of their kids. It affects kids for the rest of their lives when they grow up in turmoil. No matter what kind it is.

I met my ex-husband and started dating him in 8th grade. We lived an hour and a half drive from each other. That meant that our parents (mostly his) had to drive us back and forth to see each other until we had our licenses. From the beginning, we were like heroin for each other. SO BAD, but so "addicted" or what we thought was in love. From 8th grade all the way through high school we dated, broke up and dated again. We dated other people and always found our way back to each other pretty quickly. At age 17, I graduated (a year before him), so after I graduated I decided to take a year off of school (stupid) and move to the town that he lived in. I lived in his grandparent's apartment. That turned out terribly. He ended up finding a new girlfriend, I ended up moving back home and decided to have a lot of fun at the lakes. That is when I met Myles (my current husband). That summer was so much fun that I don't remember a lot of it. We had a lot of drinks, dancing and late nights in Okoboji. It was so stinkin' fun that I ended up pregnant with my first born. I was, of course, freaked out because I was so young (18 and then 19 when I had him) and really didn't "know" Myles. I remember going to Planned Parenthood to get confirmation of the pregnancy. That is where I went for my birth control, so I knew my way around anyway. I had already taken between 2 and 23 home pregnancy tests, so I knew I was pregnant but I just had to have the "official confirmation". After I took the test, I remember the lady telling me that I had other options. I immediately said that I wasn't interested and I left. I always knew that I wanted to be a Mom, I always knew I wanted to be a cosmetologist, I always knew that I wanted to get married, I always knew I wanted to be successful. I just didn't really get it done in order. I remember telling Myles and he didn't have a lot to say, which freaked me out even more. I was so used to my ex-husband having so much to say (and vice versa) that I expected an outburst. I remember Myles' dad saying that I was his lucky charm because he didn't think that he would ever have grand kids. I remember telling my mom in the car on the way to go shopping. She didn't believe me because whenever I ate too much, I would always joke that I was pregnant. I got really extreme. I threw all of my birth control pills out of the window and then I ate a piece of meat to prove to her that I was indeed pregnant! HAHAHA. Thinking back now, that is just so hilarious to me. Our parents were so supportive. I ended up getting really freaked out about the unknown and I just felt so comfortable with my ex-husband because that's what I "knew" and I didn't know Myles as well so I left and moved to Sioux Falls with my ex-husband. His parents were pissed. No, more than pissed. Livid. He was in college now and I was holding him back. That was all actually true, but when two people who are so hard headed want to be together--you cannot tell them anything. We stayed together and I gave birth to Ashton. When Ashton was two months old, I got pregnant with Ariah. Yep. You read that right. Yes, I was on birth control. I remember calling my Mom and saying "How could this happen?!" and she said "Well......you are just Fertile Mertile." We had Ariah in February of 2005 and then we got married in June of 2006. We shouldn't have ever been married in the first place, but when you have kids, you get married. That's just what you do, right? I remember being so frustrated on my wedding day, nothing felt "right". I was stressed to the max, I think I even called his mom the "B word". In the midst of all of it, I remember calling Myles around November of 2006 to tell him that we changed Ashton's last name, so he would need to change it on Ashton's insurance. He had not seen Ashton in awhile because I fought him so hard (with attorneys) that he just gave up on visitation. He asked me if he could see Ashton. I said that was fine if he came to Sioux Falls to see him. Myles and his parents came to see Ashton and I remember just having a flood of feelings for him right away. He had never, ever talked negatively to me, he loved our son and I think for those years I hadn't seen him he was just "out of sight, out of mind". My ex-husband and I were about to move to Colorado for his internship, which Myles knew about. I took Ashton to spend Christmas with Myles' family before we moved. When we moved to Colorado, things went from bad to worse with my ex and I. I felt miserable there, my ex and I were not getting along even a little bit, the kids were not happy because we weren't happy, I worked from 6pm-2:30am and then "watched" the kids all day so that he could do his internship without pay and we wouldn't have to pay daycare. Life was awful. March of 2007, the kids and I flew back to Iowa for a visit and I just knew I wanted to move back. I was happy there, I missed my family and I needed to get my kids to a happier place. Myles and I had been texting each other and I missed him so much. It was wrong for sure...but it is what it is. After we got back to Colorado, we ended up moving back to Iowa via my Dad and his friend coming with a moving truck. I remember just thinking that I was crazy to do that but it felt good to get the hell out of there. I felt so guilty for leaving my ex by himself in Colorado, but I knew I had to do it for the sake of my sanity.

I will never forget the first day that my little two year old Ariah was at my (now) in-law's house. They had a friend stop over and without skipping a beat my father-in-law introduced her to them as his granddaughter, Ariah. It melted my heart and I just knew I wanted us to be a part of their family forever. 

-Fast Forward-

Myles and I have been together since, had our last born Keegan in 2008, married in 2009 and life is GOOD! Ariah's dad (my ex) and his family are very involved in her life. They are GOOD PEOPLE. Just because two people are not good for each other does not mean that they are not good people. Her dad supports her, he calls Ariah almost every, single day, they FaceTime about once or twice per week, he has a wonderful girlfriend with a great family and they all love Ariah to pieces, his Grandparents still live in Iowa and come to Ashton and Ariah's events. Ariah always says "I am just so lucky because I have two dad's." She is. She really, really is. Explaining to everyone else why my oldest and youngest have the same dad and the middle child doesn't is a little confusing at times but it's okay. Our life is our life and no one else's. I love it exactly the way that it is. The only problem is that we have to make sure that this little girl doesn't get spoiled ROTTEN! ;)

I Give Up

Our family has never celebrated lent before. In fact, we keep religion mostly private unless we are praying for someone. Is that weird? I don't think so, but some people would say it's crazy and that we just couldn't have a strong family if we don't practice religion religiously. ;) I say that our family is strong because we communicate, we love hard, we do pray often and privately and we have a LOT OF FUN! I talked to one of my friends the other day and she told me that it makes her feel uncomfortable when she is asked to pray out loud because she feels like it is private. I agreed because like politics, I think it is weird and "wrong" to push your religion onto anyone else. Praying for me is almost like meditation and journaling. I love to do it, it makes me feel whole, but I want to talk to God about things that are private and things that I just don't want to share with anyone else. Yes, I was raised going to church, Sunday school, etc. but I didn't ever get into the groove where I thought it was fun, exciting and I for sure never loved it! I also go along with the belief that going to church doesn't make you any more Christian than the next person who chooses not to.

Our kids started going to the Catholic school this year, so they decided to give up something for lent. Myles and I decided to jump on the bandwagon with them to support them and WHY NOT?! Ashton decided that he will give up time on his iPad to exercise more, Ariah is going to volunteer at a nursing home, Keegan is going to give up time on his iPad to pick up our community and Myles and I are going to give up Facebook from the time that the kids are picked up from school until they go to bed. :)

We are excited to see how this goes and to do this together as a family! 

That's So Random

1. I am LOYAL. I will go to bat for almost anyone, as long as I feel a genuine relationship and connection with them. I do what I think is right always, all ways.

2. My kids just found out that I am a vegetarian. I have always cooked meat for them and I don't make a big deal out of it. Ashton hardly ever eats meat and the other two kids and Myles love it.

3. I was born in Iowa, but I have lived in Nebraska, South Dakota, and Colorado. Loved the city of Sioux Falls as a single person, the weather and scenery of Fort Collins, CO, but Spencer, IA is right where I want to raise my family and have my business.

4. I believe that it is our responsibility to take care of our earth. I cringe when I see junk flying around or when I see someone liter. I love seeing our recycling pile higher than our trash pile.

5. I don't believe in miracles. I believe in God, hard work and good people.

6. I do not ever tolerate lies. Trust is a big deal to me and once it's gone it is really hard to get it back. I would rather face a hard truth than what someone else would consider a small lie any day.

7. I think things are funny all of the time, even when they should be semi-serious...hilarious. Love to laugh until my belly aches.

8.  I love giving gifts. I would rather give than receive any day, and I can never wait until the event to give the gift.

9. I love playing pranks. Just ask my youngest brother. ;)

10. I love cooking, but I loathe baking. I make a mess baking, I never seem to have all of the ingredients and I don't like the exactness of it all. Cooking is fun to me because I can just make something up and it always seems to turn out!